Sort of.
For those of you who weren't following the goings on in Las Vegas on Saturday night, I'm pleased to report that Miss Michigan was named the winner of this year's Miss America Pageant, held at the Planet Hollywood Resort and Casino. The prized Lombardi Bouquet went to 19-year-old Kirsten Haglund [ed note: legal is legal is legal] of Farmington Hills, MI. Having already been named Miss Oakland County 2007 and Miss Michigan 2007, Haglund's run for the roses completed the ultimate tri-fecta. The Detroit News notes:
She also won the Miss America swimsuit contest, wearing a black and gold bikini.
You mean this bikini?:
[The judges were powerless]Whew! In addition to being my actual lucky number, "19" also avoids a felony in every state save West Virginia, where they can't count--which probably explains why the youth pregnancy rate is so high there [ed. note: I have no idea what the youth pregnancy rate is in West Virgina, but some reasonable deduction leads me to believe that is must be high given the large number of reported incest cases from last year [ed. note within the ed. note: I just made that up too]]. She kind of looks like a better version of Ricky Bobby's ex-wife, described in the film as a "stone cold fox." Shit, let's get another view:
[Could've won Miss Universe if she opted for a thong]Not too down with the shoe selection FWIW, but they probably wouldn't be on for very long if ya know what I mean. Eh? Eh? Anyway, Haglund's victory gave the Mitten State its first Miss America winner since Kaye Lani Rae Rafko [ed. note: that's some name; and she's not even Hawaiian] of Monroe wore the Lamar Hunt Crown in 1988. I guess the bubbly just gets that much sweeter after 20 years. The win also ended another significant drought--this one for her family--as Haglund's grandmother, Iora Hunt, 82, of Elk Rapids, won the Miss Michigan pageant in 1944. That family has the genes, yo. If I can pull a Tracy Morgan and somehow sire Kirsten's first daughter, that baby is a shoe-in for Miss Michigan 2028. Then all I'll have to worry about is keeping the little girl off the pole, as Bill Simmons would say.
Haglund's father was interviewed after the event:
Asked if he knew she was going to win, he thought for a moment.
"Nobody ever really knows," he said. "But she's incredibly articulate and very intelligent."
Dad makes a good point there. I'm not surprised she won. She's definitely got a great set of, um, intelligents.
Note: The M Zone stole my title, but since I was lagging yesterday and didn't have a chance to press "publish," Yost gets all the glory for technically beating me to the punch. As recompense, I lifted the two photos he posted and put them up here for easy viewing.
